Image: Marvel Studios via Outnow.ch

• People are petty. And tiny. Then again if you are the god of thunder I guess almost everyone would seem tiny.

• Do not get into a discussion about percentages with women. It won’t help even if you are Tony Stark

• Agent Coulson’s first name is Phil. Not Agent.

• Tony Stark is genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. He is also volatile, self-centered, and I doesn’t play well with others. Depends which way you look at it.

• Dr. Banner’s work on anti-electron collision is unparalleled. But however pales in comparison when he turns into enormous green monster.

• Having said that – I never knew turning into a big, raging monster is called having a condition nowadays.

• Contrary to what you might think poking Bruce Banner will not make him Hulk out.

• Having said that his anger management issues are spectacular.

• Who knew demi-gods are so sartorially challenged? Thor does look like he is wearing drapes, meanwhile Loki and his helmet with horns? Yeah, not a good look.

• In case you were wondering – this is what Shawarma is. And yes it’s delish, I’d murder one right now.

there isn’t much to say, is there?

Well apart from it’s a long, loooong time until July. And that the trailer looks great.

I felt a tinge of worry that the trailer might contain the best bits (you know the drill, the trailer looks great and then you get all buzzed about a movie. And then you go to see it and it’s meh at best). But I had to laugh at myself – if it was anyone else BUT Nolan that might be possible. But there is no way these are the best bits. And by that logic if what we can see in the trailer are not even the best bits… well… it *should* be one hell of a movie!

Image: Fox.com

Dear ladies and gents,

there is good news and bad(ish) news.

Good news is that Fringe has been renewed for fifth season. The bad news (or maybe not really bad news after all) is it will be the final season with 13 episodes only.

Now before you accuse me of being a demented lunatic for thinking it is a good thing it is the last season or that there are only 13 episodes – can we talk Lost? Or the X Files for that matter? Lost got a bit well… lost along the way. But once there was a set number of episodes until the end, it got good. Really (REALLY!) good. And it took me days to digest the finale.

X Files on the other hand, well it was great when it first started. But then it started to drag on and on and on. Were nine seasons really necessary? I don’t think so.

And now we have Fringe. I freaking love Fringe. I do. How can you not? It’s clever and complicated and good and makes you think. And it’s funny. Come on, it’s the same show that gave us the word vagenda.

But I’d rather if it went out with a bang than a whimper. You know what I mean?

So tell me dear ladies and gents, what do you think of Fringe being renewed for one last season?

Source: TVLine

Image: Marvel Studios via Outnow.ch

Dear ladies and gents,

I’m trying (and failing miserably) not to do the jumpy claps. If I ever get overtly enthusiastic about a movie usually one of two things happens – a) the movie is rubbish and b) worse still I leave the movie theater feeling meh.

So the most I will allow myself to say is that these recent Avengers trailers look hm… interesting? Yes, me thinks interesting is neutral enough. And I totes didn’t do a jumpy clap just now.

You can check the release dates by country at IMDB and you can check out new clips and trailers below.

(on a side-note – of course I still watch Celebrity Apprentice – feel free to judge away. I know it’s horrible. But I can’t stop. I console myself that I have never watched them Kardashians. Or Jersey Shore. Not that Donald is any better).

Favorite catchphrase – it’s not personal, it’s business! Bish, you have got to be kidding me! You’d think they’d realize by now there is *NO* actual job involved

Having said that – if you had to work with majority of the people Trump recruits for CA… well… I hope you have access to good meds and/or hard liquor

The only person whose opinion matters in the boardroom is the Trump. Which would be fine and dandy if the man didn’t change his mind all.the.bloody.time.

I never thought possible person could be devoid of all humor. Donald Trump IS that person.

Person who does best in the boardroom – the one who can talk the loudest over people.

Person who does the worst in the boardroom – the one who doesn’t like to shout. And not even carrying a big stick will help them.

There is always at least one trainwreck per season (see Dennis Rodman; Gary Busey)

There is always at least one infuriating idiot per season (see Blagojevich, Omarosa, both Lisa Lampanelli and Aubrey O’Day this season)

Having said that it’s not ALL bad, sometimes there are some decent (at least they seem to be decent), entertaining people (see Cyndi Lauper; Marlee Matlin)

Ivanka Trump got all the good genes in the Trump family.

There is no bigger celebrity ass kisser than Donald Trump.

Having said that am I the only one who can see the resemblance between the Trump’s mouth and chicken bottom? No, only me? Fair enough.

Dear ladies and gents,

am I the only one who thinks there isn’t much to watch these days? No, only me? I’ve been watching Scott & Bailey and Case Histories over the last month or so and now that has run out I’ve started on old seasons of Waking the Dead (all really, really good).

But I digress. In a bit of good news for all uncle Steve’s fans our lovely Mr. Fry is set to return to our TV screens in a new drama for ITV.

The bad news – it’s not Kingdom.

The good news is it is a 2-hour film based on the novel Doors Open written by Ian Rankin.

On a sidenote – if you are unfamiliar with Rankin, well you should familiarize yourself pronto as he is the one who wrote all the Inspector Rebus novels. If you like crime novels, these cannot be recommended enough plus there are 17 of them. 17! So. Much. To. Read. Alternatively you can also check out Rebus series with the brilliant Ken Stott.

Back to the matter at hand – Doors Open is about a dude named Mike Mackenzie (played by Dougie Henshall), a bored self made millionaire who after a night of drinking with his mates – art expert Professor Gissing (played by Mr. Fry) and banker Allan Cruickshank – decides to pull off a perfect crime. It involves Edinburgh’s private art collection owned by National Gallery of Scotland and not available for public viewing. The trio decide to swap the masterpieces with forgeries during the Doors Open Day when Edinburgh’s buildings of special interest are open to public.

So the plan is there is theory. The only problem is our band of merry robbers don’t have the criminal know-how. Mike decides to rope in his old school friend Charlie Calloway, who is also a small time criminal. But obvs Charlie’s involvement sparks some unwanted attention from the local gangsters and trouble ensues.

And there you have it ladies and gents, that’s the gist of it. The filming starts this month but there is no air date as of yet. I will let you know as soon as I know something.

I saw “Clash of the Titans” remake from 2010 and was pretty unimpressed by its bland corporative competence. 3D was so bad that I simply took my glasses off ten minutes into the film and watched the rest of it the old-fashioned way. The only thing that confused me about the movie was the filmmakers’ decision to tell a story about the death of Greek gods. Now, that is an interesting concept for a movie, but you know what else is interesting? Greek mythology, that’s what!

Its sequel, “Wrath of the Titans”, posits different problem stemming from the same premise: once you kill off all the gods, what you remain with is just a bunch of dirty bearded guys in a desert. Now, I have nothing against movies about life of Jesus but I just wish they didn’t advertise this as a movie about Greek mythology.

Luckily, not all of the gods are dead: Zeus (Liam Neeson) gets released from a nursing home to visit his son Perseus (Sam Worthington). It’s been about ten years from the last movie and Perseus has gained a son, a mullet and about 15 extra pounds. Zeus warns Perseus that with all the gods dead, it’s just the matter of time before all the demons escape from Tartarus and wreak havoc on mankind. But Perseus is too caught up in his wife’s death to bother with such petty things as the end of the world. It’s only when an escaped chimera burns his village screaming “YOU WAN’T ANGST?! I’LL GIVE YOU SOME ANGST!” that Perseus gets going. Meanwhile, Hades (Ralph Fiennes) tries to wake their father Chronos, himself a prisoner of Tartarus and thus evade his demotion from a deity into a villain of a bad Hollywood movie.

CGI monsters look great, particularly Chronos who is a colossal mass of smoke and lava more akin to a force of nature then regular monster. Rosamund Pike plays warrior princess Andormeda and Toby Kebbell is comical relief Agenor but they don’t really get much to do in a movie whose 90 minutes is mostly about big action scenes. Ralph Fiennes and Liam Neeson get some surprisingly touching scenes where they ponder their lives and incoming deaths while Bill Nighy as mad Hephestus is a welcome addition. As for me, I can hardly wait for the movie’s sequel called “Ennui of the Titans” about old Perseus who, in a world without gods and monsters, spends entire movie discussing philosophy of Jean Paul Sartre with Sisyphus.

Story takes place in Panem, a sort of futuristic Roman Empire situated in North America where rich, decadent Capitol oppresses impoverished provincial Districts. Every year Capitol demonstrates its villainy by demanding two teenagers from each District to participate in “Hunger Games”: a spectacle that combines gladiatorial games with “Survivor”. Katniss decides to volunteer as a tribute and thus take place of her younger sister chosen by the lottery. Luckily, Katniss knows how to hunt with bow and arrows otherwise the movie would last mere 90 minutes instead of almost two and a half hours.

First third of the movie tries to present story’s setting as believable but the more we learn about Capitol, the more cartoonish they sound. Population of Capitol is a mass of shallow, cruel, decadent consumers while “Hunger Games” themselves are immensely expensive spectacle sending a dubious message that would sooner incite to rebellion instead of pacifying the poor. Good dystopian fiction works because it presents believable evils instead of merely monstrous ones.

It’s when the actual “Hunger Games” begin that the movie hits its stride. Games take place in an immense artificial arena with numerous hidden traps. Rules are simple: out of 24 tributes, only one can survive. Tributes form temporary alliances well aware that soon enough they’ll have to murder each other. All the while, they also have to think about impressing the audience because there are hidden cameras everywhere and sponsors can provide valuable assistance. Violence gets brutal but not as much as your average slasher horror. Several characters’ deaths are poignant but they would be more effective if the movie spent more time setting them up instead of “Hunger Games” themselves.

“Hunger Games” is too long and spends too much energy trying to remain faithful to its material. Movie’s message seems to come down to “Killing kids is bad.” which is – hopefully – something we can agree on. It’s the other themes of the story that are more interesting like its critique of media manipulation, impossible standards of beauty or government oppression in which our each gesture can be potentially interpreted as an act of rebellion. As it is, “Hunger Games” mostly works as a sort of grim entertainment. If it helps steering people towards classic novels such as “Lord of the Flies” or movies like “Rollerball”, it might do some good.

so being the eejit that I am I have decided to check out the Killing. You’d think I would have learned my lesson after last year but no… obvs I am blond for a reason.

See I thought I’d might find out who the killer is. And now you have my permission to point and laugh and call me a silly cow. Because that’s exactly what I am.

Of course we didn’t find out who the killer is. Of course we didn’t! Because that would be too simple. And we won’t find out who the killer is until season 2 finale. And there are 13 episode (13!!!) altogether. 13 episodes of a show that moves at a pace of a snail with a case of bad digestion.

Pardon my French but screw this shit – I think I’ll just watch the original instead.

Will tell you this though – if you by any chance suffer from insomnia, you might want to give it a whirl – I managed to doze off 3 times (3!!!) during the opening episode. Better than sleeping pills is all I’m saying.

If you are that way inclined check out the trailer for the Killing below.

another 80s favorite (or at least it was a favorite of mine) is set for revival. New series of Yes Prime Minister has been commissioned by Gold (subscription channel that owns both Dave and UKTV; it where you can see all of the your old comedy favorites) and will have 6 new episodes. The series will be based on the stage version of the show.

Now I’m the first person to turn my nose on news of revivals/new versions of the old shows/insert appropriate (or rather inappropriate here). But I freaking loved that show!

The only thing is the talented gents who so wonderfully portrayed Jim Hacker (Paul Eddington) and Sir Humphrey Appleby (Nigel Hawthorne) respectively have both passed away. So it just won’t be the same. It can’t.

But the series is being written by the original writing team – Antony Jay and Jonathan Lynn.

And herein lies the crux of the matter – did you watch for the writing? Or did you watch because the actors were so damn good? Or did you watch for the combination of both?

We can all agree there is plenty to mock, criticize and snark about when it comes to politics. And I’m sure the series will be current and sharp and sarcastic and witty, I just don’t know if it will have the same pull for me as it did all those years ago. Because… I mean… it was Sir Humphrey for crying out loud!

Source: UKTV