In the movies

Dear ladies and gents,

over the last 2 weeks I have managed to see two movies. Short reviews of both below.


I like Melissa McCarthy a lot. Loved her in Bridesmaids, loved her in St. Vincent, LOVED the Heat. Identity Theft? Tammy? Not so much.

I saw the trailer for Spy and I laughed a lot. And I have to say, it doesn’t disappoint. Comedy in my opinion is one of the hardest things to get right. What tickles me might not tickle anyone else. And vice versa. For example – Hangover (and all the subsequent installments)? I don’t think I laughed once. I just couldn’t understand what the fuss was about. The worldwide gross? $467 million. So what do I know?

But Spy is funny. Hilariously funny. Laugh yourself into a belly ache funny. And everyone involved was bloody brilliant – Melissa McCarthy, Rose Bryne, Miranda Hart, Allison Janney. Although to be fair – I knew these ladies can do good comedy. Jason Statham on the other hand? Didn’t have a clue he could be funny. But there you go. Also Jude Law was in it? It should tell you something about the level of performance here when Jude Law was more a blip on the screen. I was all like – oh hey Jude Law you are in this too whatever. And Jude Law is not a bad actor. So if you need cheering up or if you want to treat your mum to a good movie she might enjoy or if you want a break from all the lets-blow-up-everything-to-bits blockbusters, Spy is your movie.

Which brings me to…

Jurassic World

I feel I need to preface this by saying a few things:

- I really love Chris Pratt, I think he is funny and I’m delighted he has 3 huge hits under his belt.
- I am aware that Jurassic World is a monster of a movie worldwide (all pun intended).
- I really love Jurassic Park.

All that said – I disliked Jurassic World. I didn’t hate it, I just thought it was meh. To a point where I kinda actively wished that dinosaurs ate all the humans because omg-what-the-effing-f*ck-where-the-effing-humans-thinking? I’m sure it makes more sense in my head.

The jokes were lame. So lame. I was side-eyeing that sh*t so hard. But there was a bunch of “bros” sitting in the cinema in front of us who were laughing uproariously throughout the movie. Hardest of all I might add when Bryce Dallas Howard was running around in heels (which… UGH don’t even get me started on that damsel in distress sh*t).

One of bros is a movie critic (!!!) So surely (surely!!!) he saw the first movie. Surely he realized it was far superior to this one. Alas. I thought there was something wrong with me because I didn’t enjoy it as the bros in front of me. Then I got home, googled some reviews and obvs I’m in the minority here.

Jurassic World is a summer blockbuster. Or rather the blockbuster of this summer. But in my opinion it lacks all the oomph the original movie had. Also? Lame. And I freaking love dinosaurs.

But what do I know.

I have since then re-watched Jurassic Park. And it’s still awesome.

The Martian trailer

Dear ladies and gents,

have you read Andy Weir’s The Martian? I freaking loved that book.

It’s about Mark Watney, an astronaut who is presumed dead after a mission on Mars goes to sh*t. After a storm hits, his team members run for their lives and being they journey back to Earth thinking that Mark is dead. Only he is not. He is stranded on Mars with minimal supplies and now he has an ultimate make-it-work moment in order to survive.

And he really makes it work. Also it’s a freaking funny book (yes, you’d never think a tale of survival would be so funny).

At any rate, it’s a great book. BUT… as I’ve read it, I kept thinking how can they possibly turn it into a movie?

Ridley Scott did. Which. Hm have you seen Prometheus? The first hour was so bloody good. And then it was not.

But this looks dare I say it – promising?

Sense8 – first impressions

Dear ladies and gents,

Sense8 is available for streaming on Netflix.

Sense8 is about eight people scattered all over the globe who all of a sudden realize they communicate with each other mentally. Obvs this is a super simple summary of the storyline, things do get more complicated. But this is the jist. The series was created by Andy and Lana Wachowski and J. Michael Straczynski.

I mentioned the series briefly in my summer TV shows post.

What I don’t like:

- it’s slow. At times painfully slow. The first two episodes were a freaking slog. Sh*t all happened. But then again that’s my problem with a lot of HBO/Showtime/Netflix shows. They have the time to tell the story at their own pace. Sometimes it works (see Daredevil). And sometimes it drives me bloody mad (see Bloodline). I haven’t been driven mad as of yet.

- I was a bit worried this will turn into a Tim Kring show? You know there are all this characters and they are somehow all connected together and it makes sense for a few episodes and then it just sort of… disintegrates? That didn’t happened either.

- I am iffy on some of the concepts. I’ll preface this by saying I am biased. I saw Jupiter Ascending and was doing this for the most of the movie:

But I wanted to give this one a go. Let me give you an example without giving too much away. In the pilot Daryl Hannah gives birth to these sensates. Not like proper birth, more hm metaphysical one? So my mind immediately went to Plato and this giving-birth-to-an-idea thing? But then I was like surely (SURELY) this would be too complicated and too fancy of a concept for a TV show? Or maybe I’m just being a horrible snob? At any rate – yes, am a bit iffy on some of the concepts that crop up later on as well.

- also I expected much more freaking out over the whole I-can-mind-talk-to-people-on-the-other-side-of-the-globe thing. That and I bloody well do hope there will a pay off in the end. But that’s just me being a persnickety bish.

ALL of that said – I do like it. My mind wasn’t blown, but it’s good enough/engaging enough that I keep watching. I love that the series takes you all over the globe and that it features a truly diverse cast.

So tell me ladies and gents, has anyone seen Sense8? Any initial thoughts?

Summer TV shows

Dear ladies and gents,

as I have mentioned before, there isn’t much on at the moment. But that is about to change in a week or so when summer TV shows start airing. Down below you can find a list of some of the stuff I’ve found that *looks* interesting (looks being the operative word). I’ve used TVLine’s handy calendar to check the dates.

True Detective – returns June 21st. This season stars Colin Farrell, Rachel McAdams and Vince Vaughn. I am really curious how will the story unfold this season.

Hannibal – returns June 4th. Lord. It will be guts galore fo sure.

The Strain – returns July 12th. I forgot how effing gross the Strain is.

Royal Pains – returns June 2nd. Your summer dose of light and fluffy.

Murder in the First – returns June 10th. Murder in the First had a solid first season. The second season will deal with a new crime.

Orange Is the New Black – returns June 12th. Always solid. And I can already see sh*t all will get done that weekend.

The Last Ship – returns June 21st. I’d never thought I’d enjoy anything made by Michael Bay. But there you go. They had me at viral-infection-that-kills-almost-all-of-the-population.

New shows

Aquarius – aired already. Aquarius is produced by NBC and they have released all of the episodes at the same time. I saw the first two and it’s not bad?

The Whispers – premiere airs June 1st. It’s something about a paranormal force trying to take over the Earth by possessing kids? At least that’s how I got it. Could be great or it could disintegrate after a couple of episodes.

Sense8 – premieres June 5th on Netflix. So this was created and produced by Andy and Lana Wachowski and Michael Straczynski. Normally this would make me… pause? I mean – have you seen Jupiter Ascending? BUT. If we have learned anything at all this year is that Netflix does not produce sh*t. Also? SAYID!!!

Dark Matter – premieres June 12th. I realized I still haven’t found a replacement for BSG. So you know, I am game to give this a go.

Proof – premieres June 16th. Jennifer Beals stars as a doctor who is trying to find a proof whether there is life after death.

Killjoys – premieres June 19th. It’s about space bounty hunters you guys. Space bounty hunters! The only problem is it’s been a long (looong) while since anything made by SyFy grabbed me.

The Brink – premieres June 21st. Jack Black and Tim Robbins. That alone will make me check it out.

Mr. Robot - premieres June 24th. New summer show by the USA Network. The pilot is available for streaming already and it’s in my queue. Don’t know what to tell you to be honest – this looks interesting. But then on the other hand – I know USA Network is trying to be all edgy and sh*t, I’m just no certain it’s working.

Do let me know if I have missed anything interesting.