Image: BBC.com

• Did you know there are 243 types of tobacco ash?

• There is no worse fate then being bored.

• There is no worse fate then being boring and/or being surrounded by boring people.

• If you are bored it is not advised to suffer in misery. It is mandatory to keep shouting at people as often as possible “Don’t be boring” (which I happened to be exposed to a good while back and it is not amusing. My heart goes out to Watson)

• Solar system? Earth revolving around the sun? Not really important.

• How to appear taller? Wear a good coat and have a short friend.

• Ms Hudson? She is not a house keeper.

• There is such a thing as a consulting detective.

• There is such a thing as a consulting criminal. And even though I loved Holmes ever since I was little itsy bitsy part of me thinks being a consulting criminal might be a tad bit more fun?

• You never ever turn your back on a boomerang. Never ever.

• How to check if person has a dog – look for dog hairs obvs. However if the dog hairs are located lower part of the body only it’s a small breed dog.

• There is such a thing as rabbits that glow in the dark.

• Need the police? Find a gun and shoot in the air. Much faster that way you see.

• Benedict Cumberbatch? Hot. Really, really hot. You just need to get over the pretentious name. But yes, hot.

• You know you have a hit show on your hands when even readers of Daily Fail sorry Mail debate what exactly happened

unlike their American counterparts British TV networks go all out during the holidays. And when I say all out – I mean ALL out. New shows, old shows, specials, mini-series, TV movies, there is something for everyone. Down below is a list of shows that will air during the holidays. I do hope you will find something you’ll enjoy.

Absolutely Fabulous (Dec 25th; BBC)

No explanation need – Eddy and Patsy are back. Here is another sneak peek

Sherlock Holmes (Jan 1st; BBC)

Cumberbatch is wearing a sheet. Well… hello there!

Great Expectations (Dec 25th; BBC)
The adaptation of Charles Dickens novel the series stars Gillian Anderson, Ray Winstone and David Suchet.

The Borrowers (Dec 26th, BBC)

Based on a book written by Mary Norton The Borrowers is about tiny people who live under the floorboards in your home and survive on scraps. Stars Christopher Eccleston AND Mr. Fry.

The Gruffalo Child (Dec 25th; BBC)

Another children’s story this time based on a book written by Julia Donaldson and featuring voices of Robbie Coltrane, Rob Brydon, Helena Bonham Carter, John Hurt and James Corden.

Dr. Who (Dec 25th; BBC)

Please, what’s Christmas without Doctor Who?

The Royal Bodyguard (Dec 26th; BBC)

The Royal Bodyguard marks David Jason’s return to comedy.

Lapland (Dec 24th; BBC)

Lapland is a comedy drama series about the Lewis family who make a trip to Lapland to search for Santa and all other things Christmassy. But it is not so easy to leave your troubles behind. I couldn’t find a separate trailer but you can get a sneak peek in this BBC trailer below.

Raymond Blanc’s Christmas Feast (Dec 18th,; BBC)

I’m not saying I will be trying to attempt to cook any of these complicated dishes but you know… I love cooking shows. Plus it’s nice to see Adam again.

Downton Abbey (Dec 25th; ITV)

I love Downton Abbey so much, but I have been trying to pace myself and leave something for Christmas. The special will have to wait because I need to catch up. Hence I haven’t looked at the preview, but you can find it below.

Agatha Christie’s Poirot (Dec 26th; ITV)

Poirot returns and this story is based on the novel Clocks.

Just Henry (Dec 18th; ITV)

Just Henry is based on a book written by Michelle Magorian. Henry is a boy whose father died during World War II. When his medal is posted home Henry decides to investigate what he led to his father’s death. For the life of me I couldn’t find a trailer for the show but you can get more details at the link above.

down below you can find a list of few new British shows that you catch up on this November (or what is left of November). As you can see there is crime, there is drama, there is a documentary and there is Jamie Oliver so I hope you will find a new favorite.

The Jury – The Jury is the latest legal/drama/crime offering from ITV and this is the second season (believe it or not Gerard Butler stared in first season). The story centers around a high profile murder trial (or rather a re-trial) and 12 jurors who have to decide whether the accused man did or did not kill three women a few years ago. I found it compelling enough to tune in and this is the type of series ITV does really well so it is definitely worth the watch.

This is Jinsy – now This is Jinsy you will either love or hate. Because it is rather bizarre. And surreal. But it does have its funny moments. It was originally produced for BBC but now it is airing on Sky. This is Jinsy is about residents of Jinsy island (all 791 of them) who are being monitored by Arbiter Maven and Operative Sporall from the Great Tower and a system of tessellators (includes video cameras/slot for paying fines/pills dispensers respectively). As I said I think it is an acquired taste.

Top Boy – Top Boy is a Channel 4 mini series and a story about a group of young lads living on at Summerhouse housing estate in Hackney. Because they are so marginalized they have turned to gangs and drug dealing to get a sense they belong somewhere, anywhere. Rather grim but worth the watch.

Death in Paradise – a BBC production Death in Paradise is about detective Richard Poole (played by Ben Miller), a London police officer who is sent to Caribbean island of Saint Marie to investigate the death of detective who died at the mansion of the local aristocrat. After that murder is solved Poole stays at the island as the new detective. The only thing is he is not that into sea. Or sand. Or the heat.

Spy – Spy is another comedy series for Sky about a man called Tim (played by Darren Boyd) who is stuck in a dead end job and rather miserable. In a bid to impress his 9-year-old son he decides to apply for a job thinking it is for data entry with the government. However it turns out after he gets the job that the job doesn’t really involve data entry at. It does involve being an MI-5 spy.

Frozen Planet – if you love a good documentary you will love (loooooove!) Frozen Planet. It is produced by BBC and narrated by David Attenborough (the perfect combination really). It is about Arctic and Antarctic, the change of seasons in the region, the wildlife and the changes and challenges the region is facing due to the climate change. The camera work is unbelievable, the series is informative and educational and interesting. AND Blu-ray is out in UK on December 8th (which would make for a perfect Christmas gift is all I say).

Jamie’s Great Britain – you know I am more than willing to watch anything Jamie Oliver dishes out. And this is no exception. In this Channel 4 series Jamie travels all across UK in search for some new ideas and inspiration and to cook up some of UK’s most favorite dishes.

this is not a proper teaser trailer, it is a part of the trailer for all the upcoming BBC programs. But you know we love Sherlock around these parts so yes I totes squealed a little.

The second series will include A Scandal in Belgravia, The Hounds of Baskerville and The Reichenbach Fall. The Hound of Baskervilles was one of the first Arthur Conan Doyle novels that I’ve read and it scared me shitless. In my defense I was in primary school at the time. But then when I was a bit older I’ve read Cujo so I totally forgot about the hound.

Anyhow I digress. The series should hit the screens at the beginning of 2012. Oh and if you watch very carefully you might recognize another person we love to see on our screens as well. Yes you’ll be able to see Mr. Fry in this.

And on a sidenote – the second trailer for Sherlock Holmes the movie is out. There is no Mr. Fry in this one.

there haven’t been many British shows of note during the summer. Unless you of course count Celebrity Big Brother as interesting telly. But there are a few interesting shows out at the moment – 2 sitcoms, 2 crime dramas and Doc Martin returns for the fifth season so check out this short recap below and I hope you will find something worth tuning into.

Trollied

Trollied is one of the two comedies that have premiered on Sky 1 this summer and it is a part of Sky 1′s campaign to revitalize British comedy. Trollied stars Jane Horrocks (who you might remember as ditzy Bubble, Eddie’s assistant from Ab Fab) as deputy manager of a fictional supermarket called Valco in Cheshire. She has the hots for her boss Gavin (played by Jason Watkins). As expected the series also features a number of quirky characters in form of the rest of the employees. It’s not hilarious, but it is definitely good for a few laughs and grows on you after a while.

Mount Pleasant

Another comedy for Sky 1, this one situated in the North. Mount Pleasant follows the story of Lisa (played by Sally Lindsay) and her husband Dan (played by Daniel Ryan) who live in a well off suburb of Manchester. Even though they do have their tiffs and scraps, Lisa and Dan have been married for 10 years and are very happy together (despite Lisa’s parents popping by unannounced on regular basis). To be honest, I liked this one less than I liked Trollied but if you simply have to check out every sitcom that comes out of UK it is worth a shot I guess.

Appropriate Adult

Image: ITV.com

Appropriate Adult is ITV produced mini-series staring Emily Watson and Dominic West. The story centers on Fred West, a serial killer and Janet Leach who was his appropriate adult (term used to describe a volunteer appointed by the police to sit in on questionings of minors and sometimes adults whose duty is to make sure the suspect’s rights are not violated). The series follows the story just after West’s arrest, his prison stay and his subsequent suicide.

The Field of Blood

Image: BBC.co.uk

Another 2 part series this time produced by BBC. The Field of Blood is based on the novel written by Denise Mina. The series is set in 1982 Glasgow and follows the story of Paddy Meehan (played by Jayd Johnson), who is a copy girl for broadsheet the Glasgow Daily News. Paddy wants to become an investigative journalists even though it is predominantly male field at the time. But then a 2-year-old boy Brian is murdered and Paddy’s 10-year-old cousin becomes a chief suspect. Paddy embarks on an investigation of her own and soon finds herself in danger, not to mention torn between loyalty to her family and her dream of becoming a journalist.

Doc Martin

Image: ITV.com

Doc Martin is a long-standing favorite of mine. So shoot me, I like Cornwall and its countryside. And cranky doctors. Now after a bit of a break (due to Martin Clunes’ other projects) Doc Martin is set to return this month with its fifth series. The story picks up where it left off – Doc has become a father, him and his partner Louisa are not coping well with all the late nights and he has postponed his return to London after the death of his aunt. The new GP arrives but soon it turns out she might not be up for the job after all.

Image: Starz.com

Dear readers,

I didn’t have much time to watch any of the shows last week. So I’m terribly behind on almost everything (on a side note I know I was complaining a few weeks ago there is nothing to watch but now all of a sudden I have trouble keeping up. Which although annoying is a welcomed change this summer).

I did manage to catch up on Torchwood. And it seems Torchwood fans have some strong reactions to the storyline so far.

I thought the best would be to just list the pros and cons.

Pros

- the premise. No one dies. NO ONE. And as Captain Jack Bollocks said himself it’s not so much that no one is dying but it is the fact it is happening on the global scale at the same time
- John Barrowman, Eve Myles, Kai Owen, Bill Pullman, Lauren Ambrose
- it still has it’s funny moments. That guy that got blasted in the explosion and his head was not connected to his body but he was still alive? I know it was gross and horrible but it was also funny.
- Eve Moyles still looking normal (unlike her American counterparts who all wear stilettos with what look like at least 5 inch heels and not a hair out-of-place).

Cons

- the pace of the storyline. It picked up a little bit in the third episode but still, come on! And I know there are 10 episodes this time around but that’s no excuse.
- crisps/chips, I mean whatever, I get it Torchwood is in the US now but there is no need to harp on about differences between American and British English
- little to no introduction into the character’s back story
- repeating major story points time and time again. We got it the first time around – big pharma is bad. And global. Thankyouverymuch I don’t need it repeated in three consecutive scenes.
- Rex Matheson’s hole in the heart or whatever injury he has sustained. It looks gross. Really gross. And I don’t get grossed out easily. Also aspirin for pain management? Hm yes, good luck with that.

To sum it up – is Torchwood watchable? Yes. Is it good? Yes. Is it exceptional as it was last season? No. Not yet anyway.

On a scale from 1 to 10 where 1 would be major drivel and 10 would be exceptional telly I’d place Torchwood somewhere around 6. Maybe it would help if we considered it as a spin-off or a reboot rather than original series? Although to be honest when I look at the list above it makes me miss Weevils, you know what I mean?

So what you do think dear readers, did Torchwood get better or worse?

the IP technician finally showed up today. And I think he wouldn’t have showed up were it not for me kicking a fuss on Twitter (it’s unbelievable how efficient they can be if you complain in public). Anyhow he fiddled around, rebooted something and Internet seems to be working fine at the mo. So I’m writing this post rather fast because you know how it goes – they fix whatever needs fixing, it works fine while the repairman is there and the minute he is out the door, it all goes to shit again.

Edit – spoke too soon *sigh* the connection is getting patchy again.

So without further ado here are some the new British shows that have premiered in April/May.

Exile

Exile is a psychological thriller starring John Simm (you might know him better from Life on Mars and State of Play) as a journalist who gets the sack after shagging his boss’ wife. And because of his quite heavy drug use. So he returns home (in his case Ramsbottom, Lancashire), where his sister Nancy (played by Olivia Coleman) is taking care of his elderly father Samuel (played by Jim Broadbent) who suffers from Alzheimer’s. It turns out Tom and his dad had a falling out and their relationship has been strained since. Tom returns home and while going through his dad’s stuff finds a tape with an interview that his dad did years before that leads him on the path of discovery of a story his dad worked on in the 90s. Anyhow it is a story about families, illness, corruption and just really nitty gritty stuff that I think US networks will pounce on sooner rather then later (like they did with both Life on Mars and State of Play).

Vera

Vera is a new detective series produced by ITV that stars Brenda Blethyn (loved her in Secrets and Lies). The series is based on books written by Ann Cleeves and it is about Detective Inspector Vera Stanhope who although having demons of her own, is totally dedicated to her job. Her colleague Joe Ashworth (played by David Leon) is like her surrogate son and they give it their all to find the culprits and give some peace to both the victims and their families. ITV does detective dramas really well and this one is no exception.

Case Sensitive

Another police drama from ITV Case Sensitive stars Olivia Williams (Dollhouse) who stars as Detective Charlie Zailer and Darren Boyd as her partner Detective Simon Waterhouse. They are called to a crime scene where they find a mother and her five-year-old daughter dead. Is it murder, murder and suicide or is it even something worse? Case Sensitive is based on the book Point of Rescue written by Sophie Hannah.

The Shadow Line

Produced by BBC Two is a crime drama series that has a formidable cast that includes Stephen Rea, Chiwetel Ejiofor and Christopher Eccleston. It is a story about a murder of a drug baron Harvey Wratten and the story is told from both the point of view of police officers who are working on the investigation and criminals who have been part of Wratten’s clan and are trying to find his murderer. It is part drama, part crime series, part conspiracy thriller – all in all a good effort by BBC. Plus it has seven episodes! (and with British series that is always a plus).

I’ve mentioned in my little rant the other day that I have been watching BBC’s Silk. I do this you see, store shows for a rainy day (like major holidays and during the summer) when there is absolutely nothing to watch. As has been the case of late.

And overall Silk wasn’t bad. For what is worth I really know very little about UK law (no surprising given the fact I was exposed to US law shows since I was in my teens. And I wasn’t the only one. I have a friend, who shall remain nameless, who used to shout objection, objection when she was sloshed and she disagreed with something we said). I’m sure lawyery types from UK would tell me all about how little it resembles the realities of working for a chambers. Isn’t that always the case with legal/medical/police procedurals though?

But I thought the storyline was interesting, if a little uneven and the cast was very good (Maxine Peake was brilliant, I quite enjoyed Neil Stuke‘s performance as the senior clerk and even though I like to harp on just how good looking Rupert Penry-Jones is, the man is far from being just an eye candy, his acting abilities are nothing to sneer at either).

I was happy to watch something interesting the only snag was the series was only six episodes (dang and bollocks). So I did a bit of googling and it turns out the writer of the show Peter Moffat did another show of the same type back in 2000 called the North Square. And reviews were overall positive so I thought I’d give it a whirl. Did I mention this one actually has 10 episodes? Yay for that.

Anyhow the premise of North Square is the same as for Silk, the only difference being the show is set in Leeds. And the actors are different. It does feature rather fresh faced Rupert Penry-Jones (yup!) and (AND!) Kevin McKidd (of the Grey’s Anatomy fame. He also looks rather fresh faced too). And yes this show isn’t bad either. The only thing that struck me… well… it is not such an old show considering it was made in 2000. But for some reason it looks (and feels) like it was made in the 80s. Don’t know if it is because of McKidd’s Hawaiian shirts or the clunky mobile phones or a naff music but it has 80s written all over it. I’m not saying the show isn’t good (it is) that just struck me as a bit odd.

You can check the trailers below. Edit – I just realized the trailer below features Rupert Penry-Jones stripping to his undies. Hm I totes didn’t embed that trailer on purpose, I just remembered that scene. Consider it a bonus!

But now to you my dear readers, have you seen any British shows of late that you would recommend? Am I missing something really (REALLY) good? Please leave you suggestions in the comments below.

I am fully aware Oscars were on last night. Is it ok for me to say I thought it was a bit blah? Yup. Not that funny (maybe they should have gone with Ricky Gervais instead of Hathaway/Franco combo?) I am delighted Colin Firth finally won (yay for that!) and yay for the King’s Speech winning but since I did bet on Geoffrey Rush winning the best supporting role I am a bit bitter about that (the odds on Colin Firth winning were too small, I didn’t even bother). Oh don’t be all shocked, I haven’t bet in ages!

Anyhow instead of harping on about who wore what/who was robbed (Nolan and Inception, sure they did win and I agree on cinematography and visual effects but overall I think that movie was seriously underrated) I will give you a list of a few new and returning British shows that have been hitting the screens over the last few weeks.

Raymond Blanc’s Kitchen Secrets

Raymond Blanc is back! I did harp on about him and some of his more complicated dishes (anyone in a mood to make a chocolate spoon and a chocolate cup? You can check how it is done in the trailer below) I do find his latest offering quite refreshing. He loves to cook, he loves to eat and he doesn’t shout – a definite win-win in my book. He can still get fiddly (the episode with shellfish featured a lobster recipe that involved making a jus that is too complicated for me to even attempt and replicate at home but that grilled squid salad looked absolutely delicious). Next episode – cakes and pastries, o la la!

I’ve also found a post on BBC blog written by the show’s producer and it was interesting to read how to show is actually made. All I will say is if they feed me I wouldn’t mind doing the washing up.

Silk

It has been a while since I last saw Rupert Penry-Jones on TV screen. Well he is staring in newest BBC show called Silk. Before your mind wonders no it’s not a spin off from Silk Stalkings, it is a show about the Bar and barristers who are all in competition to become the Queen’s Counsel. Whoever gets the job has to wear silk robes and a rather odd looking wig hence the name – it is called “taking Silk” after the robes. The rest of the cast includes Maxine Peake, Neil Stuke and Natalie Dormer. If you enjoy lawyer-y shows then this one is definitely for you.

Friday Night Dinner

Friday Night Dinner is latest Channel 4 sitcom that stars a face that you have maybe seen before – Simon Bird of Inbetweeners. I like the premise of the show – the two Goodman brothers return to their childhood home every Friday to have dinner with their parents and their gran. But their parents and their gran are a bit odd? Peculiar? I think the PC word would be eccentric? Well how would you call a gran that dances round the house in her bikini? Well that! Anyhow the series was meant for Channel 4 digital channel but they liked the pilot so much it is now shown on the main program. Overall it is giggle inducing.

Mad Dogs

Sky1 had a few shows that I have enjoyed of late – Thorne and Strike Back to name a few. And their productions are all snazzy and shit. But this latest production is not only snazzy and shit but also features quite an impressive cast – John Simm, Philip Glenister, Max Beesley, Marc Warren and Ben Chaplin. It a story about four childhood friends who travel to Majorca to visit their friend Alvo who is retiring. But Alvo is murdered and four friends get involved in world of crime against their own will. I found it funny and not bad at all.

I am trying to highlight all the stuff that will be shown during the Christmas period so you have something to watch in between all the cakes/turkeys/book reading/arguing with your family/insert any appropriate Christmas activity. Today it’s ITV’s turn so you can check the their offerings below.

Murder on the Orient Express – it has been 22 years since David Suchet first played the most famous Belgian detective Hercule Poirot and this latest adaptation is one of my favorites. ITV will also feature a documentary that will air on December 19th and sees David Suchet travel on the Orient Express. He dwells deeper into its history, secrets, mysteries and learns from the Orient Express staff just how little the service has changed since it’s first journey in 1883.

Marple – Marple fans should  not feel left out because ITV will show not one but two Marple movies. The first one The Secret of Chimneys will air on December 27th while the second one The Blue Geranium will air on December 29th.

Come Rain Come Shine – for any of you who might be fans of Only Fools and Horses this might turn into a treat. David Jason stars as Don, an ex docker who lives with his wife Dora and has two grown up children David and Joanne. Don likes the simple life while his son’s lifestyle is well… plush. But it soon turns out that Don is on the verge of financial meltdown. The script is written by Jeff Pope.

Downton Abbey – American readers might also like to know that another ITV hit Downton Abbey will air on PBS as part of their Masterpiece series on January 9th.