Run For Hills – Reality Shows Coming

I haven’t been the most diligent Couchslob in the past months (I have a new job to nurture), but a really, really terrifying thought just struck me and I felt obliged sharing it with YOU! Those half dozen, or so of you, who have been reading my benighted dribble might have noticed I hate realty shows. In fact I loathe them. They are the lowest form of entertainment you can imagine. Scratch that, (They are the lowest form of entertainment you can imagine.), they are a mental rape. I have more fun watching Dung Beetles roll those balls of turd, than I have watching any reality show. Actually, reality shows are the turd Dung Beetles roll around. I know most of you will not agree, but think about it. They are exploiters of human stupidity and voyeuristic tendencies. And such simple ones at that! Recipe for a reality show is: Take an activity people like to do, like sit around in case of Big Brother, put a pinch of shock value and a dollop of sexual tension and voila you have a reality show. Once you have the concept down, all you’re missing are the contestants. Now this part is easy, because the best kind is the stupid kind, and that kind always comes. When I say stupid, I mean Paris stupid, you know just above mentally challenged line, so they would say a lot of like’s and OMG’s and every once in awhile they would pull a Britney. Actually, more stupidity you can extract from them, the better the show is.

So, how did I come to rant about reality shows? Simple, the longer the writers strike, the longer it will take for new storylines to be developed, As a result producers will start to put together new, in their minds, more exciting reality shows they themselves are able to develop. Since they are only capable of developing alcoholism and drug problems, remainder of the season will look something like this: The Assembled (12 episodes reality show about Jane and her problems with hangnails), followed by The Outgoing (reality show following Travis, 24 y.o. college senior struggling to become fraternity president and crabs at the same time). To conclude, I’m saying it is time we all get involved and start contributing. The first thing YOU need to do is sign the petition and join the cause. Second, if you are able, buy a box of pencils through pencils 2 media moguls program (widget at the top of the page) and third continue reading this blog. OK, the last one will not directly help the writers, but it will help by making us feel appreciated. Couchslobs Unite!

P.S. By the time this post is published all reality show ideas will be copyrighted!

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