My latest discovery – Talky blog

Dear people who come to read our blog I want to say 2 things a) thanks for popping by and do stop by more often and b) I think an apology is in order.

Let me elaborate! I pride myself on staying current with all the TV’s coolest things (that must be the Bull/Cow in me that is the dedicated consumer). Anyhow I think an apology is in order I still dont understand how this persona managed to stay under my radar for so long. Do you know who I am talking about?

Ross Matthews of the Talky blog fame or more correctly Ross the Intern from the Tonight show with Jay Leno. Goodness gracious me that guy absolutely and inexplicably cracks me up! And I think his dog is the most precious thing (well after my dog and cats).

I don’t know why I have this new found affection, it might be due to the fact he reminds me of my Estonian dancing buddy from England (now if there is one person who can shake his booty to Enrique Iglesias then it is my dancing buddy darling) but nonetheless I don’t understand how everyone does not know about this guy. His Talky blog is OMG… I mean yesterday he showed us how to clear sinuses… Helloooo! But my favorite one by far is when he talks to a pet psychic… it had me in stitches!

Now when I think about it I have this dreadful job interview today and instead of going corporate I should apply to be the Intern’s intern. I mean I have all the qualifications – I am excellent with dogs, I do not mind grossness one bit plus I can locate a restroom (for when you have to you know go as in “go”, blog buddies will know what I am talking about) in a 5 mile radius.

Hilarious, a bit gross but never boring thats Ross Mathews for you, do check it out, he will tickle you pink.


Absolute Power – Take Two

Happy Stephen Fry Appreciation Day!

After Berta’s executive decision which declared Monday a Stephen Fry Appreciation Day, I’ll continue this tradition with a post about Absolute Power.

Absolute Power follows the exploits of Charles Prentiss and Martin McCabe the best “sultans of spin” in London (I’m not alluding to Alistair Campbell or Peter Mandelson). The one thing that’s truly exceptional about this show is the fact that writers actually had contact with PR. As a fact bender myself, I can honestly tell you that this show can be a PR manual or, at least, a how-to of sorts. This is why I truly like it! So what can you learn if you watch this show?

Anything Can Be Spun – Whether it’s a country like USA or Bin Laden family wanting to buy British Airways, no subject is impervious to good spin.

French People Are Not Frogs – It is just plain rude to address French citizens as Frogs. If one requires addressing a non specific French person one should say “Perfidious Frenchmen”. Oh yea, this can be applied to women as well, apparently they are just as perfidious as men (I’m all about Political Correctness).

Insulting Royals Is Not Rude – Apparently the royals are here to be insulted. That is one of their primary purposes. However, if the uncivilized banana republic you spawned from doesn’t have royals, like mine, it is jolly good fun taking a piss at one’s president.

Language Is FunSaying “Make fun of Georgie the Decider” in previous sentence would have been so much easier, but why should one say anything with six words, when it can just as easily be said with twenty five?

Sex Heals All Wounds – No, I don’t mean have sex all the time (well … yea, that too), but any scandal, large or small, can be diminished by a good (or bad) sex tape.

Ugly Duckling Effect – Anyone can become popular, they just have to be whored up. Get yourself a good stylist, a designer and Bob’s your auntie!

Reality Show Is Good – Stars believe they are above us mere mortals, so they have to go on reality shows to show they are just like us. More down to earth the show is (like showing one’s snatch or wang dudle), closer they feel to their fans.

Admit and Explain – People (or Sheep as they are better known) love a good honest apology. Whether you are Crazy Homicidal Pedophile or just plain old Politician, good honest to God admittance of guilt (with a few references to The Almighty himself just for good measure) and a plea for forgiveness can make any scandal go away.

John Tickle is a real person – Apparently!

Prentiss-McCabe Syndrome – If nothing else works this is the ticket out of any and all scandals. Syndromes include: misplacement of moral fiber, loss of faith, ambition and will to live.

Love Them, Hate Them – You have To See Them!

You can also hear the radio show here.


Stephen Fry Appreciation Monday – Absolute Power

Following post does come with a disclosure – I cannot give too many details about my previous place of employment. It is not a matter of me being snooty, hoity toity and all-important, far from it, my job was anything but. But I did work for some high-powered people so I simply do not want to put my foot in, sort to speak. In case I might (heaven forbid) consider going back to PR.

Absolute Power was an interesting series for me to watch as I saw it twice – once before I had any PR experience and then after I had some PR experience under my belt.

Absolute Power is a comedy about Prentiss McCabe PR agency in London. Our ingenious Mr. Fry plays a character named Charles Prentiss, who apart from having an ego the size of England is also a PR guru extraordinaire. To him moral fiber is something you have for breakfast to get your bowels moving.

His employees are fetched to do his bidding, which includes anything from making sure their clients do not come off as drug addicts (which proves a bit difficult as the said client sniffs constantly) to staging faux muggings that make their client hero for the day by the press.

The first time around I thought the series was at best preposterous and at worst ludicrous. Little did I know. Although I have never been forced to stoop that low, I did have my moments some of which include: calling a client a horse’s hoof (it was meant to be a compliment tsss); being send off to pacify a naffed off hack (the reason was he was less likely to shout at a fresh-faced girl namely me) and being chased around the office by my boss with a fur coat (as I have great dislike and distaste for fur things that were once attached to innocent animals). Yup I cannot believe I wrote it either but there you go.

What I find fascinating about Absolute Power (apart from the fact it is bloody good fun, witty, sharp and snarky just how I like it) is Mr. Fry himself. It never stops to amaze me what a fan-bloody-tastic actor he is. On one hand you have a man who writes a letter to a little boy about the importance of brushing his teeth regularly just because the little boy’s sister asked him to. On the other hand he plays a character that invents a disease to put a positive spin on his client’s wife beating ways. And he makes it believable! Even an old snarky cow like me immune to any possible PR load of bollocks cringed in disgust a few times. As I said bloody good actor that Mr. Fry.


Things I learned from watching Lost

  • You can survive a plane crash
  • There are mysterious islands that can cure any ailments.
  • If you do get stranded on an island chances are you are not the only people there.
  • There are monsters lurking in the jungle.
  • Redemption is normally a good thing. Redemption on the island however means you will die soon.
  • Never use 4, 8, 15, 16, 23 and 42 as lottery numbers. You might win money but shit will happen to your family.
  • Invisible people? They do exist.
  • When traveling by plane do pack a brush. In case the plane crashes and you don’t survive someone might need it.
  • When traveling by plane pack a suitcase full of knives – you never know when you might have to skin a boar. That is if they let you on the plane to begin with, knives and all.
  • Skills and things that might come useful if stranded on a deserted island fishing/gardening/swimming/guns/knives/backgammon/cards/pregnancy tests/ping pong table/golf clubs
  • Polar bears can inhabit tropical islands.
  • There is a reason to push the button.
  • If you decide to stop pushing the button all hell will break loose and sky will turn purple.
  • Food can drop from the sky.
  • You don’t necessarily lose weight if you only eat fruit.
  • Dynamite can sweat.
  • Cant open doors? Blow them up, that is why God invented sweating dynamite.
  • Statue of Virgin Mary is never just a statue of Virgin Mary.
  • Do not have unprotected sex on the island; you will end up a) dead or b) pregnant.
  • Some are prone to flashbacks. Some are prone to flash forwards. Only Jack is prone to both.
  • If stranded on an island with monsters, bears and strange people trying to kill you it is a good idea to hide guns/information/hatches from your fellow survivors.
  • If Desmond starts to follow you around, its time to write your will brother.
  • How to get rid of boring characters? Bury them alive.
  • 6 weeks hiatus in the middle of the season is a very bad idea.
  • To start a new season in February is even worse idea.
  • Acceptable and commendable – mind-blowing season finale; unacceptable and contemptible – 15 crappy episodes before that.